Setting healthy boundaries for empaths - why it's so freaking hard!

Do you find it very hard to disconnect from someone you love who is draining you?

Or to say "no" when you cannot do something, but you sense the other person's need?

Or to shut down from everything you've been feeling all day and be able to rest at night?

If so, you are like most empaths - you have a hard time having healthy boundaries.

For most of us, we've been taught that boundaries are a bad thing. In fact, if you had narcissists in your life that wanted to take all your energy and have you always ready to help them, they likely called you "selfish," "conceited," or worse when you tried to establish a healthy boundary with them.

If that happened, you likely internalized that, and now associate "healthy boundary" with "I am a selfish, horrible person for even considering such a thing."

It's time to undo that damage right now.

A boundary is simply a line drawn that indicates what is okay with you and what's not okay with you.

And, for an empath, a boundary is also "I am willing to take on this much energy from you, but I will not take that energy from you."

If you want to see why setting boundaries is so hard for us as empaths - and learn how to start setting them without feeling awful - check out my video below.

You can do this. You deserve to have healthy boundaries. You deserve to decide when you take on other's energy, pain, or issues, and when you don't want to do that.

It's not selfish. It's healthy.

Why Empaths go beyond the point of burnout - and how to take care so you don't!

✔️Do you feel guilty when you need to shut down for a while?

✔️Are you sometimes not even able to respond to a text, because that is energy you just don't have?

✔️Do you feel weird or weak when you need to hide in your room for a while - or a whole weekend - because you simply cannot take one more bit of stimulation?

✔️Is it almost impossible for you to stop helping, even when you KNOW you are on the way to burn out (or are already there)?

👂 If this sounds familiar, listen up (I speak from real life experience here):

Empaths are more prone to burnout and compassion fatigue than any other group, but they deal with it completely differently.

How so?

A caring non-empath might get to burnout and go numb, get worn out, realize they are going to get sick, and then they will stop helping or shut down (or both). They will detach from the situation and stop caring. A survival instinct kicks in and they stop.

They will, basically, save themselves.

An empath will have all the same issues of sleeplessness, stress, exhaustion, irritability, and increased illness - maybe even serious illnesses - but he or she will NOT stop giving, taking care of whoever or whatever, or basically saving the world.

This is how so many empaths end up seriously ill; they go to the place of total burnout and, despite every sign that they are going to break, they keep pushing forward.

Their need to help overrides their need for self-care.

A sick empath helps no one. Honor your need to recharge. It's okay to shut down. If you don't protect your energy, no one else will do it for you.

Need help with this? Go here for lots of free resources!

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Becoming an Aware Empath: Trusting (and Strengthening!) Your Empathic Abilities

Are you an unaware empath?

Yeah, I used to be, too. It’s more than a little overwhelming.

If you an an unaware empath, you will experience these things:

1. Getting headaches and stomachaches, but only around certain people.

2. Feeling overwhelmed in crowds, with no particular reason.

3. Suddenly having your mood change (for instance, suddenly feeling very “on edge” or angry, when you were perfectly happy, and there is no reason for that change in you).

4. Having certain symptoms or even illnesses, but only around a particular person.

5. Feeling very anxious and overly alert in public transportation situations

This can make you feel like you are crazy (you aren’t!).

I even went to a therapist many, many years ago and was trying to explain all of these things to her. She diagnosed me with bipolar disease.

I am the least bipolar person you will ever meet, but that was her answer for all that I was explaining. Thank goodness I had enough self-esteem and sense to walk out of there and refuse that diagnosis.*

I’ve worked with SO many empaths that have had similar things happen - that were told they had some mental illness, when, in fact, what they have is a finely-tuned emotional and energetic system that is absorbing everything from everyone around them all the time.

And they can’t control it.

This is why I developed by 4 A’s of Awareness process for empaths!

When you are able to understand this simple process of becoming aware of whose emotion you are feeling and then knowing if (and how) you need to act on it, you will be so much more aware and in control of you empath abilities!!

Want more tools and resources like this? Sign up for my Empath Institute today!

Hey Empaths - You are allowed to take care of yourselves!

Do you feel pulled apart at the seams because you have so many people who need so. many. things. all. the. time. and they expect you to put aside all your needs to take care of their wants?

Yeah, me, too.

It took me a LONG time to finally understand that I was allowed to keep some energy for myself.

I was allowed to say "no."

I was allowed to have things that were important to me, and I didn't need to reschedule everything just because someone suddenly needed me.

I was allowed to do things that made ME happy.

I was allowed to do things for me.

If you'd like to learn how I did it (and save yourself the misery and burnouts I went through), sign up for my Empath Institute!

It will give you every tool I created to help myself, as well as a community of empaths supporting each other, and live calls with me.

Sending you lots of love and strength.

You deserve to take care of you. You deserve some of the goodness you put in the world to come back to you. Remember that...

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