How to Put Down Things You are Not Supposed to Carry
Mantra for 2023: PUT IT DOWN.
For a lot of us, carrying everyone else's stresses and pain and worries is a way of life.
It's so automatic that we don't even notice it happening, until we start having shoulder pain…
And aren’t sleeping well…
And feel completely keyed up all the time.
I find that this is particularly hard for empaths…
We are trained to look for solutions to people's pain and suffering.
We WANT to make it stop.
We WANT to help.
And that's amazing!
But, if we don't know where we end and the other person begins, it becomes a problem.
A BIG problem.
We end up unknowingly carrying a big ol' backpack filled with other people's stuff.
In this state, you cannot relax.
You are on hyper-alert, desperately trying to solve at least a few of the things you are carrying.
You start buckling under the weight.
Eventually, you break.
If you break, you are no good to anyone.
But beyond that, YOU deserve to be happy.
YOU deserve to live a good life.
YOU deserve to have energy for yourself.
YOU deserve to be present.
So, how do you stop carrying everyone else all the time?
You begin by realizing that others have the same power you do.
They have the same free will to make their choices.
And they are going to use that power in the way they wish.
You realize that you can show up, give them your best, and then put it down.
What they do from there is on them, not you.
This came up last week on my practitioner certification call...
One of the students had serious shoulder and neck pain; it was clear that she was carrying everyone else on her back.
So, we took a look at what she was carrying...
Her mom was in pain and needed to go to the doctor.
She had repeatedly begged her mom to go.
And yet, her mom was not going to the doctor, and she was very stressed about this.
I asked her: "Can you MAKE your mom go to the doctor?"
She replied, "No."
"So, you have done what you can do. Put it down."
The same was true for a worry she had for her 25 year old son...
"Can you make him do what you believe is best, and probably IS best?"
"No," she replied, laughing. "He has always been stubborn, even from a small child...I could never tell him what to do."
"So you have 25 years of experience that tells you that you are only going to stress yourself out trying to hound him to do what's best. Put it down."
By the time we had gone through the list of things she was carrying, she told me, "You know what? My shoulder and neck pain is totally gone!"
She had put down the emotional backpack, releasing all of the stress and worry.
You can do this, too.
Take a look at the things you are carrying. Then ask yourself:
"Have I done what I can?"
"Have I shown up and used my personal power in the best ways?"
"Can I MAKE this person take the positive steps I know would be best for them?" (SPOILER: The answer to this one is 'no." 😂)
Then, make the choice to put it all down.
You've done what you can.
This is where your responsibility ends and the other’s begins.
See other people as powerful.
See them as having the same power you do to make choices.
Understand that you are using your power as you choose, and they are using theirs as they choose.
They may choose to stay stuck.
They may be so attached to pain and suffering that they use their power to stay that way.
Or, they may use their power to move forward in a way you didn't expect, but is best for them.
Put them down.
Then look at how you can use your power in the best ways.
What can you do with all the extra energy you have when you put down the responsibility for others' lives and choices?
What can you do to stay in the present moment and find joy for yourself and your life?
What steps do YOU need to take to live your best life now?
Do that.
And, throughout the day, remind yourself to not carry others.
Stand up, act like you are taking the backpack off, and say out loud, "I am putting it down!"
P.S.
Are you carrying heavy burdens and are in pain?
Are you dealing with life stressors or past trauma and have pain or disease?
If so, make 2023 the year you learn to listen to your body and heal.
When you understand the message your body is sending you in pain or disease, you can heal everything - your body, your mind, and your life…
Because it is ALL interconnected.
That trauma you went through as a child is showing up as low back pain today.
Or that divorce you had two years ago is affecting your legs, causing aching pain as you try to move forward.
Or dealing with a toxic boss is showing up as a sore throat and shoulder pain.
Your body is desperately trying to tell you where the wounds are that need healed…
What life experiences need shifted….
What relationships to change or release….
But you can’t understand until you know how to translate the whole message behind every ache, pain, lump, bump, or rash.
Every symptom has an underlying meaning…
But you have to learn the language - like learning a foreign language.
You don’t know that “Hola!” Or “Bonjour!” means “hello!” until you are taught that…
Likewise, you don’t know that a stabbing pain in the left shoulder means you are being attacked by a woman in your life…until I teach you that!
And, like learning a foreign language, once you learn how to translate symptoms, you know how to do it for the rest of your life.
If you are ready to bring power and healing to your life NOW?
Join Body Language: Deciphering Your Body’s Clues so You Can Heal today!
Right now, it’s only $222 for everything….
Including group mentoring with me once a month AND a 20 minute private session where I translate the message behind your pain or disease and get you on the path to healing.
It’s an over $3,000 value with everything I include…
This is the lowest I will offer this in 2023, so join now.
I can’t wait to help you bring power and healing to your life!
(It’s my favorite thing to do!)